A Drive-By Post

 

I'm not sure why I chose this particular season to undertake The Inventory of my parents' lifetime accumulation of stuff.  I've been pretty steadily at it, but find myself getting bogged down, not in the things so much, but in the papers.  Every scrap is a reminder of some facet or other of their personalities and their lives--it's all insight into their minds.

Learning, or re-learning, these things about them makes me both sad and happy, at once.

Yesterday, I was hit by an intense, but short-lived, frenzy of cleaning.  Toward the end, I put up our Christmas tree.  Artificial.  Couple of years old.  With lights that still work.

Years ago, when Tony and I met, his home (where we live together now) was decorated (and I think he had lots of help from his sister, Julie) in a very white, stylized way, with glass tables and animal print pillows.  It was like something out of a magazine.  No pets.  No plants.  No dirt.

Back in those early years together, we had a white Christmas tree.  I decorated it with colored glass balls, white lights and bead garland.  It always made me think of a big, white cake.

I loved the white tree.

Until it started turning yellow.

The house has a more lived-in feel about it these days, thanks to my slovenly, hoarding ways, and the addition of lots of pets over the years and plants which are ranging completely out of control.

I find it very difficult to get rid of a house plant, even it's just kind of a weed.

Where was I going with this?

Oh, yeah.  It's Christmas, and completion of The Inventory is about to be overtaken by lots of extra work related to The Holiday Season.

A few days ago, I went shopping to buy a gift for Mom's "adopted" granddaughter.  Jamie is a sweet, young girl of 13 or so whose parents brought her to Antique Village in search of a grandmother, as she hasn't one of her own.

Jamie and her parents adopted my mother for this purpose.

They visit Mom often, maybe three times each month.  Tomorrow evening, they will be taking Mom to a Christmas pageant at Jamie's school.  I'm going up to help Mom get ready and to hand-deliver Jamie's gifts, as they've often gotten "lost" in Mom's room on previous occasions.

While I was shopping for Jamie, I bought an outfit for Mom.  It's Alfred Dunner, a popular brand among the mature set.

One time, many years ago, Tony undertook to buy me some new outfits.  (It was back when we actually exchanged presents, instead of putting the money, instead, into a major house project.)  I remember opening the boxes and discovering some rather, um, matronly-looking sets, one of which was the exact same Alfred Dunner outfit that my mother had!

I was dismayed.  No.  Horrified.

I kept the outfits out of respect for our new-found love.  And, really, just thinking about the whole thing warmed the cockles of my heart and endeared Tony to me all the more.  I'm a tougher customer, these days.

There were no bumps in the gift-road for a while, until about six years ago.

For my 49th birthday, I received from Tony something I will always refer to as The-Elizabeth-Taylor-Earring-And-Necklace-Set.  Do you remember the old perfume ads that Elizabeth Taylor did?  White Diamonds?  Was that it?

Anyway, the commercials looked like they were shot through five layers of gauze.  Even so, the sparkle from her lavender/purple eyes, her lipstick and her giant pieces of jewelry shone through.  Huge, ghastly ornaments, they were, surrounded by diamonds.

Just the kind of jewelry one might need to wear on stage at the Metropolitan Opera.

Yep.  The-Elizabeth-Taylor-Earring-And-Necklace-Set could be seen from the cheap seats.

I returned T-E-T-E-A-N-S and selected other baubles more fitting to my station in life.  That is to say, for someone who is not an opera singer or stage actress or movie star.

I chalk up both the Alfred Dunner clothing and the Elizabeth Taylor jewelry incidences as proof of The Great Divide, which separates men and women, on some molecular level, in their understanding of the Universe and all things clothing- and jewelry-related.

Comments

[Karenth49]

So happy to have a last post from you before I take off on Thursday. Alfred Dunner! WHAT a good laugh that one gave me.
Off to older child's for a hefty dose of roundball and Christmas with his family before I head to visit Mom Sunday through Wednesday. Hope to get my head clear enough to pull together the remaining holiday details when I'm back. But whatever it looks like, I think I'll have a white tree Christmas in my head. THANKS!

[Miz S]

Ha ha! Poor Tony. The gift-giving thing is hard to get right sometimes. Were his feelings terribly hurt?

[Pam Jones]

"Slovenly hoarding ways" -- I'm so glad you exist and you confess such things. I find it very soothing. Like someone patting me on the back and saying "it's OK Pam; you're not alone."

I've never heard of anyone doing this, but what a wonderful idea.
"Jamie is a sweet, young girl of 13 or so whose parents brought her to Antique Village in search of a grandmother, as she hasn't one of her own. Jamie and her parents adopted my mother for this purpose."

And your spousal gift-giving tales are delightful. Ah yes "The Great Divide." I know it well. In our house, however, I am on the clueless side of the gift giving. Mostly, I've just become a careless gift-giver, now that my days of buying dozens and dozens of gifts -- for my kids, all other family members, teachers, friends of kids, and, shudder, coworkers -- is over. This year, I basically forgot to buy Doug a gift until the last minute; we've had various arrangements over the years, including lots of years where we just didn't give each other anything, and I kind of blanked out this year. Two days before xmas, I said "you didn't get me anything did you?" I was chagrined to hear that, yes indeed, he did get me "a little something." So I went out and got him some REALLY little somethings, including one I got at Home Depot. (should I confess that??) And what did he get me? A Kindle, something I've wanted but would never have bought for myself (way too self-indulgent). So his birthday is coming up in Feb and I'll try to do better.

Oh, and about the Kindle: it's weirding me out. It's magic, and if I limit myself to downloading classics, most of which are free, I'll never have to spend a penny on it. But scattered around my house are hundreds of un-read books, all calling out to me. And because I'm in this great book-exchange group I get books in the mail 2 or 3 times a week. And there are always a dozen or so library books around. I've become a book hoarder, and at this point I spend much more time gathering books and moving them around than I do reading them. Such problems.